When a parent finds out that their child has been molested, aside from wishing it didn’t happen, the main thing people want is justice. There should be some sort of universal balancing, usually through the legal system, that leaves you with a sense that the offender has paid for his/her crime. This is the promise of the legal system when you walk through doors of a police station or district attorney’s office. They are going to get the bad guy and make them pay for their crimes. Great, sign me up!
Reality Test
Reality is a lot less cut and dry. The justice system is a well orchestrated dance that we as victims simply provide the basis for it’s continue momentum. In one respect it is there to protect us, and in another it is there to protect the process. The promises of the justice system represent the best intentions of the system, but not necessarily the reality that it will bring into your life. So go into the halls of justice with your eyes open.
If you get the justice you are looking for – congratulations! Chances are it will fall a little short of your expectations. The one thing that isn’t optional is supporting your child to grow past their abuse, and not let it define their life. There’s a saying that living well is the best revenge. So let a good life for your child be your focus in dealing with their abuse because justice is optional.
Let us know if we can help you dealing with your family’s sexual abuse situation. For ideas to get started please check out our book on what to do during the early days after disclosure.
