A recent report from Britain’s Office of the Children’s Commissioner found an alarming number of sexual abuse cases attributed to gangs. The study identified 2,409 victims in the first year of the study. Of those, 155 were also identified as also being perpetrators. The abuse consists of both multi-person attacks and various activities as a part of gang initiation. And the problem isn’t limited to the UK.
If you are like most people, your view of gangs is a slightly updated version of West Side Story. The gangs we generally think of are generally ethnically or geographically specific and have identifying clothing. Usually there are enough gang members to make identification easy. That was more or less my view of gangs, and I have indirectly worked with gang members for the last few years. Unfortunately, that is an outdated view of gangs.
What is a gang?
Gangs in 2012 are more like terror cells. A gang can be as little as 3 people. They also aren’t hierarchical like they were 20 years ago. It’s more a matter of self association than an organization where you work your way up the ranks. Individuals may be associated to multiple gangs over time. This apparent lack of structure makes dealing with gangs all the more challenging. While people are expecting large groups of marauding youths, they don’t see the small groups and the dangers that they bring. As an example, 80% of all crime in the State of Massachusetts is gang related. Other states are starting to note similarly high rates of gang involvement.
The issue of increasing sex abuse in gangs probably is connected to the smaller more fluid structure. Most sex abuse is not about sexual preference or interest. It’s actually about power and control. What better way to exact control and authority in a way that is not obvious to the outside world.
Changing Landscape
The changing nature of gangs is just starting to be understood. The UK study is actually one of the first looks at sex abuse within the gang community. Gangs are not a new concept, but the criminal focus has been on drugs and weapons usage. It’s possible that the sexual abuse component has been around for a while, especially given the percentage of abused that become abusers. It’s a learned behavior of control, and both in and out of gangs, it is a cycle that perpetuates itself over time. Sexual abuse is a complicated subject. Much like gangs, we are just starting to get educated on sexual abuse as to what is really happening.
Let us know if we can help you dealing with your family’s sexual abuse situation. For ideas to get started please check out our book on what to do during the early days after disclosure.
Mandatory reporters of child sexual abuse is a noble concept which often falls short of the goal. In principal all educators, medical practitioners, child protective service workers and those licensed to work with children in camps,etc. are required by most state laws to report suspicion or disclosure of sexual abuse to the appropriate agency or police. There are also generally certain legal protections similar to whistle blower laws. It’s great in theory, and when it works, it works well. When it doesn’t work, well – let’s just say it’s hard to find an owner for fixing the problem.
Where was the Mandatory Reporter
Chances are that if you are dealing with the sexual abuse of a child, someone who may have been a mandatory reporter may not have fulfilled their obligation at some point during the time your child was being abused. Granted this is a somewhat speculative statement to make so broadly, and there are probably no statistics, but based on my experience I think it is probably true. The recent Jerry Sandusky sexual abuse case is a typical example. The mother of the first victim reported it to the school principal, because the contact with Jerry was coordinated through the school. What should have happened was the principal should have explained to the mother that she was a mandatory reporter and her next step was to contact either the police or child protective services (depending on state rules).
Also, because it was tied to an individual associated with a school or place of employment, a written report is generally followed up after the verbal report. Instead, the principal told the mother to go home and think about it because of who Jerry Sandusky was. There’s a lot of unspoken hints going on there. She might as well of said “who are you to question Jerry”, or “do you really think anyone will believe you?”. These are exactly the type of situations mandatory reporters are supposed to avoid. The responsibility is simple and not subject to interpretation, but it happens all the time.
In our case, the owner of the facility not only didn’t report the abuse as they should have, they sued us because they lost business as a result of us telling other parents what happened. They eventually filed bankruptcy and went out of business but it just added insult to injury.
Reporting Rules
Trying to report someone for not acting on their mandatory reporting responsibilities can be it’s own set of problems. Standards, training and reporting are generally managed by a child protective services organization. Designation as a mandatory reporter might be controlled by a department of education or a state licensing agency or some other agency all together. It’s easy enough to read about what a mandatory reporter is supposed to do. But guidance on what should happen when a mandatory reporter doesn’t report correctly is often vague or confusing to all concerned.
Several years ago the Hartford Public Schools had a program for early identification of child sexual abuse. The approach was innovative – they asked kids if they had ever been abused. The volume of abuse cases went way up, until some complained. Then staff were not allowed to ask any more. And abuse cases returned to normal levels. While we can point a finger at people like the principal in the Sandusky case, it is a case of the organization/community wanting to protect itself. Sexual abuse reports are disruptive to the natural order of things. For many, the best way to deal with a problem like this is to not deal with it it. The system fails the victim, but order is maintained.
Common Mandatory Reporter Practices
To eliminate these types of scenarios in the future, it’s important to have common practices in all states. There also needs to be uniform education requirements and certification requirements for all mandatory reporters. Signing a form and reading a pamphlet is not enough. And last there needs to be clear penalties for not acting appropriately as a mandatory reporter. As long as mandatory reporters are only reporting sometimes, there’s more work to be done.
Let us know if we can help you dealing with your family’s sexual abuse situation. For ideas to get started please check out our book on what to do during the early days after disclosure.
Last week Jerry Sandusky was officially sentenced and the letters to the court from Jerry and Dottie Sandusky were publicized. Basically they blamed the system and labeled everyone who testified against them as liars. Anyone who has testified against an abuser has heard the same thing. Having read similar letters, they seem to have a similar tone. They have sort of a memoiresque quality to them, as if they were written for an audience. It’s not an appeal, it’s more of a narration of events. It’s not until you get to the end he says something curious, “I know in my heart, I didn’t do these disgusting act.” When was the last time you heard that type of phrasing? Imagine if your child told you, “I know in my heart, I did not eat the cookie.” It sounds even stranger when you try to use it in a different context. I basically read this as they are things that go against everything he believes in, and he can’t reconcile himself that he is responsible.
Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing
This logic plays itself out in virtually every high profile abuse case. Prominent men, dedicated to kids and the community, are doing things that go against everything they stand for in the public eye. The public can’t reconcile it, and logically it shouldn’t be true, so calling victims liars makes perfect sense. It’s basic logic – I do good things, these are bad things, therefore I could not have done them. By the same token you can say I like to go south in the winter, birds go south in the winter, therefore I must be a bird. It looks obviously stupid when you see it on paper, but watching it play out in real life or in a court room isn’t as clear. Sexual abuse is about deception in a series of relationships that we want to be able to trust. We want our world to make sense and when things don’t make sense we revert to the simplest answer that does makes sense. And whether that is something we tell ourselves, or tell the world, just because it makes sense logically doesn’t make it true.
Let us know if we can help you dealing with your family’s sexual abuse victim situation. For ideas to get started please check out our book on what to do during the early days after disclosure.
This is not the basis for a celebrity death match. It’s more an observation on who is better at dealing with sexual abuse. The NCAA definitely gets points for decisiveness. Their decision in the Penn State case clearly sends a message that the NCAA will not tolerate sexual abuse within the realm of college athletics. The Catholic Church has yet to make any gesture that even comes close to having the same impact. In reality it’s probably not a fair comparison.
The Catholic Church has been quietly dealing with (or not dealing with) the issue of abuse within the church for decades. The strategy has been one of containment. Move problem priests to places where they are less likely to abuse. Hire a bunch of lawyers. Issue a policy statement ever so often. And write a bunch of checks as they watch churches go bankrupt around the country. A few select victims get large paydays, but most still suffer in silence feeling forsaken by their church. This cycle repeats itself over and over. The problem with the Catholic Church’s approach is that they are a self policing organization. How do you take a hard line at disciplining yourself?
Catholic Church Oversight
The NCAA has the advantage of being an oversight organization. Amongst other things it’s mission is to ensure fair competition, academic standards, and other standards for all collegiate athletics. Colleges aren’t an extension of the NCAA, they answer to it’s authority. The Catholic Church tries to be in both roles and fails in the process.
To be fair, the church has made some progress over the year. They are getting better at dealing with the problem, but they still aren’t where they need to be. Some of this is because they are fighting wars on multiple fronts. Abuse cases are global, and they are quickly followed by lawsuits and diminishing membership. Where the church has taken a band-aid approach to the cancer in their midst, the NCAA has gone for the shock and awe strike on Penn State. This full nuclear strike totally eclipsed the results of the sexual abuse case against the diocese of Philadelphia just 100 miles down the road. Point NCAA!
Advantage NCAA
Media attention aside, this doesn’t actually push a win over to the NCAA side. The NCAA response is on the scale that we wish the Catholic Church would take, but in reality a more measured approach would have probably been more appropriate. Much like parents that kill their children’s abusers, the NCAA reacted with as much force as they could, dealing with a problem they had never deal with before. In some respects the Catholic Church’s approach of pressing buttons to see what works may have actually been a better approach (even though the Church doesn’t do it well). The Church does have the advantage of experience. If it were not for the covering up that has gone along with experience, they might have actually come up with an approach that works by now.
I would like the NCAA to reconsider and take a step back from certain parts of their ruling. Somewhere between the two approaches is something that makes sense. Many of the sanctions impact the athletes which seems contrary to the goals of the NCAA. Yes make Penn State an example, but don’t just make it the Nuremberg trial of collegiate sports. Make Penn State the center for how to deal with sexual abuse in organizations of all types. Make Penn State fund the initiative at the same level of the sanctions they are imposing. Create policies that all employees or contracts at NCAA sanctioned schools be mandatory reporters of sexual abuse. Establish national sanctions for violations of non-reporting. Etc. Etc.
Finding Solutions
This is somewhat of a half baked idea, but I’ve had 10 years to think about how to deal with sex offenders, so I’ve at least had time to think about it. The NCAA took a bold step, that was largely driven by public pressure rather than a strategic approach to an organizational problem. This maybe the first college sports sex abuse case to hold center stage on all the major news outlets, but it is probably not the last. The NCAA has the advantage of being an oversight organization. They have the potential to succeed at addressing a problem that the Catholic Church is still likely to fail at. By having Penn State create a center that focuses on developing solutions that work, it could result in successful preventive and appropriate abuse response approaches for all organizations. Everybody wins!
Let us know if we can help you dealing with your family’s sexual abuse victim situation. For ideas to get started please check out our book on what to do during the early days after disclosure.
Most of you will notice that your child before and after their sexual abuse is different. Your child has an altered future. The change may be subtle so you may not notice right away, or you may just think it’s a phase. Their perception of the world has been changed, and their actual brain chemistry has been changed. (Feel free to look up the impact of trauma on the hypothalamus ) The end result is often ADD or ADHD like behaviors (PTSD is frequently misdiagnosed as ADD or ADHD). Bipolar behavior is also pretty common. There are also a variety of negative side effects that can lead to antisocial or self destructive behavior.
It’s Not All Bad
The flip side of these conditions is that people with ADD, ADHD and Bipolar disorder go on to do other things like found Apple, Microsoft, Netscape, etc. Maybe you’ve heard of some of them. I don’t know if any of them were actually sexually abused, but the behaviors can lead to greatness. The question is whether your child will descend into a life of self destructive behavior, or change the world? There are no guarantees either way, but safe to say, you child is probably not going to fit into the world the way you may have originally thought. I don’t know if there have been any formal studies, but if your child has some of the classic symptoms of sexual abuse, they may be destined to be entrepreneurs. Here’s a short video that might give you some ideas.
Let us know if we can help you dealing with your family’s sexual abuse situation. For ideas to get started please check out our book on what to do during the early days after disclosure.
